Thursday, December 11, 2008

Who’d’a thunk it!!

I usually always bitch and complain about Dagbladet (Norway's second biggest print newspaper, number one online) and I do think that I generally do so with good reason. I mean, they just suck so bad. They're a pathetic parody of a newspaper. And that's so sad, because they used to be good. I mean it, they did. I've been reading this paper for 20 years and I remember it from my childhood and teen years as being a really good paper. I think most people will agree with me on that. So it's been really sad watching them self-destruct as they have been doing over the past few years. Celebrity gossip, sex stories, 'human interest', so-called self-help or whatever you want to call it … 'We want to help you feel good about you!' … there’s such a constant focus on the unimportant and the personal that maintaining interest becomes impossible. And then we have to watch them and hear them whine and complain about how their sales are dropping, and they've tried everything and nothing works, bwaaah. It is so pathetic. Because the reason for their lousy sales is so obvious to everyone except them.

They've turned the paper into irrelevant crap that people don't want to read.

This results in lower sales. Do you really have to be a rocket scientist to figure that out? I gotta say no … because I've obviously figured it out, and I can tell you this for nothing, I'm no rocket scientist.

Anyway. One of the things I resent them for is their front page stories. These often feature completely irrelevant things; consumer affairs is a big one, for instance. I mean, when a hideous emergency is ongoing in the Congo, you'd think they could think of something more important to put on the front page than, I don't know, their predictions for which cars will be the biggest selling models this winter. Just as an example. They also do what all tabloids with no respect for themselves do – emphasize certain words in their headlines to draw prospective buyers' interest, in a very speculative way. You know, SEX or MURDER or STABBING or GUILTY … the list goes on. This normally gets my hackles up in a big way. But not yesterday.

Yesterday, Dagbladet had the bestest cover ever. I fell over myself laughing. I guess I shouldn't have, I guess that was really immature. But there you go. Maybe I wouldn't have laughed if this hadn't been a politician I really resent, but, well, she's so awful that I can't force myself to feel any sympathy for her. That's life, bitch. This cover was just so great in so many ways. Look at it:

Translation:
Demands
apology after
lesbian
gossip

Basically some guy on an early morning TV show said something about her being gay and that is so insulting to her, apparently. (I know, WTF? And he even said it as a joke, too. Way to out yourself as slightly homophobic and with no sense of humor, Ms Jensen.) Another totally unimportant story that should not be on the front page. But just look at what they've done with it. It's brilliant. I love it. It's meta.

Can you tell that Dagbladet don't like this woman either … ? ;-)

They wouldn't say so. But with covers like these, they don't have to. :-D

10 comments:

Unknown said...

Dagbladet is not and has never been the largest online newspaper in Norway—not even close. They're
a poor second to VG, with about two-thirds VG's readership

TNS Gallup's official ranking of Norwegian web sites (updated weekly)

VG is also the largest print newspaper with about as many readers as Aftenposten (#2) and Dagbladet (#3) put together.

TNS Gallup's official ranking of print newspapers for 2007 and the first half of 2008

Sales are down not because they're crap—believe it or not, they print what people want to read—but because newspaper sales overall are down, with a few exceptions such as Morgenbladet.

Leisha Camden said...

OK, sorry. I've just heard that they're the biggest online, but I haven't done any research. They ought to be the biggest. VG's website is a headache-inducing mess. And DB's comments setup leaves every other online newspaper that I've ever come across pathetically in the dust.

If they'd had VG's comments system, they'd have been in some seriously major trouble.

believe it or not, they print what people want to read
I don't believe it. I rather think that they've tricked people into thinking that they do want to read this shit ... but you can't fool all the people all the time.

If you read the discussions on Dagbladet online, you'll see that my argument has a lot of support there. Many longtime DB readers are actually pretty angry. They are not getting what they want to read, I can promise you that.

Not to say that this country isn't full of idiots dying to know Britney Spears' every move, of course.

Sales are down not because they're crap [...] but because newspaper sales overall are down
Umm ... yeah, so? Newspaper sales overall are definitely down. (And readership online is up, as far as I know.) How does this exclude my claim that people don't buy Dagbladet because it's turned into such a filthy rag?

Your point and mine are not necessarily related, although it may seem so at a casual glance.

Leisha Camden said...

http://www.dagbladet.no/nyheter/2008/12/10/557637.html

This article is the type of thing a lot of people want to read. Quality journalism. Who'd'a thunk it.

Leisha Camden said...

Your point and mine are not necessarily related, although it may seem so at a casual glance.

Actually, now that I think about it, your point proves mine, in a way.

newspaper sales overall are down, with a few exceptions such as Morgenbladet.
Yeah, exactly ... and Morgenbladet is one of the few papers that isn't full of worthless uninteresting crap.

I'd say that might indicate that crappiness and sales figures falling may be related after all. >:-)

Paz said...

in Ireland papers are biased one group in particular Evening Herald, Irish Independent, Sunday Independent, Sunday World and the Irish Daily Star, All owned by the one guy are very biased.
I hate the SEX, MURDER, sh1t too

Mombi said...

Leisha,

In regards to my post the other day, there was a huge layoff at my job on Tuesday that was all over the media. My job is okay, though.

Leisha Camden said...

Paz: Those headlines just make me sad - the thought that people really are dumb enough to fall for that. At least enough to make it worthwhile to use these braindead tactics.

Mombi: Thanks for clearing that up. I thought maybe there had been some awful accident or something. :-) I mean, not that layoffs are bad, but at least no one's died or anything ...

Good luck, take care of yourself. :-)

Paz said...

This post was in my head today as I read papers here today and yesterday and as I was reading I was amazed at the amount of BS in papers here, No wonder people get the Sunday papers finished in an hour including all supplements and the mags when it used to take all day and they have a lot to answer for in regards pushing agendas that are less important.
Damnit I need to check the healthcare supplement to see how I can balance my Yin and Yan ;-P

Unknown said...

By the way... I guess this strengthens your argument about Dagbladet: Siv Jensen never complained about the joke—some random Joe complained on her behalf, while she herself said she considered it a compliment.

Leisha Camden said...

Yeah, I discovered that too on Friday when I watched Have I Got News For You. ;-) It was Carl-Erik Grimstad, the well-known idiot, who actually filed the complaint.

Point to Siv Jensen for not being as dumb and homophobic as this headline made her seem ... but serious point from Dagbladet for presenting this article (which, obviously, I never read) in such a ridiculously skewed way.

Growl.